The View From Here

Stinks, quite frankly. I like to think that I'm the kind of person who sees her glass as half full but today it certainly felt half empty, more than half empty, maybe even down to just a few tiny drops rolling around in the vast expanse of the bottom of the glass. Today I felt more like I was looking at a stranger than the man who, for the last 32 years has been my Dad, loving me unconditionally, teaching me right from wrong, making sure that I knew how to change a flat tire and the oil in my car so that I didn't have to rely on someone else to do it for me. The man who my daughters adoringly call, "Papa" and "Poppi." The man who's the first to greet us when we arrive at my parents' house, usually at the back passenger door pulling the Girls out of the car before J even has the key out of the ignition. Today I dwelt on the what-ifs. What if he doesn't make a full recovery? What if he's never the same? What if my Girls never remember/know who he was before the stroke? This last thought was almost more than I could bear to think about. It is so easy to let all the what-ifs obscure what is tangible and known - my Dad is still with us, we love him just as much today, if not more than we did prior to November 26th, my Girls still adore him and most importantly...God is in control. He always is. And He is good, so good. While we do not know now (or ever) why this happened, I do know that He is at work in this situation and that ultimately it will be for the good, either for my family or for others.