Bits of Normalcy

In the midst of the craziness that is going back and forth to the hospital, bits of normalcy creep into our days. Napping

babies. The Big Girls trying their first 'sleepover' in the Girl's room. It was characterized by a fair amount of giggling and lasted all of about 5 minutes before Lil' Sis appeared at the bottom of the stairs. That is why she still sleeps in a crib - no way we could keep her in a big girl bed.

Yesterday J was giving me a hard time as I snapped these pics of Baby Miss and he followed it up by warning Baby Miss that she'd better get used to having her retinas burned by the incessant, blinding light of the camera flash. To which I replied that Baby Miss was indeed the third child and that I'd taken far fewer pictures of her at this point in her life than I had of her big sisters. Not to mention that I hadn't snapped a

single picture of her for two days straight until I took these.

This morning we got out the activity mat for the first time. Baby Miss's eyes grew wide, no doubt at the sight of all those brightly colored

objects dangling just inches above her face. She stared in wonder as she took it all in.

Not to be left out, Little Sis wriggled herself underneath the bars and took up residence right next to Baby Miss. Possibly feeling a little bit over-stimulatrd from the combined visual effects of the jungle animals and the audio effects of Little Sister's screeching, Baby Miss seemed to prefer gazing at the baby in the mirror.

The View From Here

Stinks, quite frankly. I like to think that I'm the kind of person who sees her glass as half full but today it certainly felt half empty, more than half empty, maybe even down to just a few tiny drops rolling around in the vast expanse of the bottom of the glass. Today I felt more like I was looking at a stranger than the man who, for the last 32 years has been my Dad, loving me unconditionally, teaching me right from wrong, making sure that I knew how to change a flat tire and the oil in my car so that I didn't have to rely on someone else to do it for me. The man who my daughters adoringly call, "Papa" and "Poppi." The man who's the first to greet us when we arrive at my parents' house, usually at the back passenger door pulling the Girls out of the car before J even has the key out of the ignition. Today I dwelt on the what-ifs. What if he doesn't make a full recovery? What if he's never the same? What if my Girls never remember/know who he was before the stroke? This last thought was almost more than I could bear to think about. It is so easy to let all the what-ifs obscure what is tangible and known - my Dad is still with us, we love him just as much today, if not more than we did prior to November 26th, my Girls still adore him and most importantly...God is in control. He always is. And He is good, so good. While we do not know now (or ever) why this happened, I do know that He is at work in this situation and that ultimately it will be for the good, either for my family or for others.

Black Friday

Indeed. Yesterday was a big ol' Black Friday to be sure. While many people willingly deprived themselves of sleep in search of a phenomenal bargain, I spent a restful morning in bed with my feet not hitting the floor until sometime shortly after 8:00. Little did I know that while I was enjoying the warmth of my bed and soaking in the soft, peaceful exhalations of Baby Miss's breathing, serious commotion was unfolding in my childhood home. My Dad awoke not feeling well...head pounding, nauseous, hot all over. Being diabetic he chalked it up to low blood sugar and asked my Mom for a glass of juice. It quickly became evident that low blood sugar was not the problem as my Dad sat on the bathroom floor not able to get up without help. With the help of my brother, my Mom got my Dad out to the car where he crawled into the backseat and off they headed to the ER. A CT scan at the hospital showed bleeding in his brain that had caused a stroke and immediate plans were made for my Dad to be air-lifted to '0ne of the nation's leading academic medical centers.' All of this occuring before I'd barely begun my day. The call came from my brother at 9:13 and I missed it. So he called J's phone and had to leave a voicemail there too. Fortunately, within 10 minutes of my brother's call, J noticed that he had a new voicemail and listened to the brief message from my brother mentioning my Dad and an emergency. J immediately called my brother back while I stood at his side in a panic, catching only bits and pieces of my brother's side of the conversation but enough to know that it wasn't good. J got off the phone, relayed the pertinent info and through a blur of tears I ran upstairs and did the first thing that came to mind, called one of the pastors at our church and asked for prayer. While I was doing this, J was making arrangements with our friends to pick up the Big Girls so that we could meet my parents at the hospital that my Dad was being air-lifted to. We ended up arriving at the ER around noon and about the same time as they did. Once they had my Dad admitted and set up in the ER a social worker came out to the waiting room and took us back. I thought I was prepared for what I might see...but I wasn't. Physically my Dad appeared fine, other than that he wouldn't open his eyes but he was coherent and talking to the doctors and nurses. It was seeing him on a gurney, in a hospital gown, hooked up to monitoring equipment that was my undoing. After a few hours in the ER we were joined by my siblings and sister-in-law and it was determined from various tests that my Dad has a loss of peripheral vision in his left eye and that his hand, arm and leg on the left side are weaker. Eventually he was transferred up to the NICU (Neurology Intensive Care Unit) where he was hooked up to what seemed like even more equipment. We spent a couple of hours with him in the NICU before heading back toward home to retrieve the Girls as it was nearing their bedtime.

Snow Bunnies

This morning J had the Big Girls up, dressed in snow gear and out the door all before 8:00 to go sledding down the hill that is just up the

street from our house. School was cancelled and so it was the Girl's first official 'snow day' of her academic life. Both Girls were so excited

to get out and play in it. And they weren't the only ones...J may have been even more excited. Little Sister kept exclaiming, "It's knowing!" After several trips up and down the big hill, with the Girls loving every minute, they got going a tad too fast, the sled veered off course and came dangerously close to jumping the curb only to be stopped by J but in the process Little Sister tumbled off the sled and ate snow.

That abruptly brought the sledding to an end. After a few minutes of throwing snowballs in the front yard, J hustled the Girls inside band we all

enjoyed hot chocolate and the warm gooey-goodness of homemade cinnamon rolls fresh from the oven. Yum!!! The perfect breakfast on a cold, snowy morning!

Love those...

rosy cheeks and noses!

Later in the afternoon we ventured out for Baby Miss's follow-up check-up to get a PKU done. She weighed 6 pounds 6.5 ounces, surpassing her birth weight and most surprising - she gained 7 1/2 ounces since her last check-up a mere 5 days ago! What?! Is this my child?! Both the Girl and Little Sister had weight gain problems as newborns so I was completely shocked and extremely thrilled to learn that Baby Miss had gained so much. The nurse said they like to see weight gain at a rate of 30 grams per day and Baby Miss has averaged 42 grams. To hear our pediatrician say, "We'll see you again in two months." versus, "Bring her back in two days for a weight check." was so foreign to me. I told her that I didn't know how to act and she just laughed.

One Week

Can hardly believe that our little peanut is already one week old. This wee one has now blessed us with three consecutive nights of seven hours of sleep! It comes in two chunks - one 3-hour chunk then she wakes up to eat and goes back to sleep for another four hours. Gammy went back home yesterday to spend the upcoming week with my brother and his wife who will be in town for Thanksgiving so J and I

are flying solo until she and my Dad return next Tuesday. If Baby Miss continues to allow us such an abundance of sleep I think we'll manage just fine!

Sister Love

So far the sister love continues. Each day when the Girl gets home from school she runs through the door, sheds her coat and backpack and races to the bathroom to wash her hands so that she can hold Baby Miss. As for Little Sister, if Baby Miss is not in the room, Little Sister is asking in a worried tone where she is.

4-day Stats

Today Baby Miss had her first check-up. She weighed in at 5 pounds 15 ounces - just 4 ounces less than her birthweight. The doctor was very impressed and pleased with that number. She also listened to Baby Miss's heart for quite a while and heard no trace of the 'dropped beat.' Hurray!! And another milestone...her umbilical cord (or 'delicate' cord as the Girl calls it) fell off today. I was completely surprised by that as both of my other Girls had their umbilical cords for close to two weeks before they fell off.

Big Sisters

These Big Sisters love their new baby fiercely. Baby Miss is not lacking for attention, especially from these two. They shower her with

affection and an endless supply of kisses, so much so, that at times I am afraid that they will smother her. They also fight over whose turn it is to hold her. All of this comes as a pleasant surprise. To be honest, I wasn't quite sure how either of them would react to having a new baby sister around cutting into their Momma time but by all accounts they've adjusted just fine. Although the true test

will be time, we'll have to wait and see what happens when the novelty wears off. But for now I'm soaking all the loving, sisterly exchanges up and treasuring every sweet kiss.

Labor, Delivery and the NICU

After having gone to bed an hour earlier, I awoke at 11:00 Saturday night to the beginning of contractions that were pretty

intense and never more than ten minutes apart. By 1:30 Sunday morning we were headed out the door into a driving rain and J was racing us to the hospital. I almost reminded him that it was important that we all arrived in one piece but then I thought better of it. Upon arriving at the maternity triage I was put in a bed and the nurse began strapping a fetal monitor around my belly. Within seconds of hearing Baby Miss's

heartbeat she commented that she could hear an irregularity, a pause at intermittent intervals. Then she continued about her routine of

confirming my info and asking a series of questions. Then she did a physical exam and pronounced that I was between 7 and 8 centimeters dilated and that if I wanted an epidural (Um, yes please! I can handle the contractions, it's the actual delivery that scares me.) we'd better hurry and that if my water were to break before then I would be out of luck. An IV was administered, my labor

and delivery nurse, Sharon, transported me downstairs to the delivery floor and sometime after 4:00am I had my

epidural. At 5:30 the doctor came in, checked and declared that I was fully dilated and broke my water. I began pushing at 5:40 and 17 minutes later sweet, lil Baby Miss entered the world crying and covered in vernix. I held her on my chest for several minutes before they took her away to be weighed and measured. Shortly after 8:00, J left to go home, shower and retrieve our Big Girls who were at home with 'Gammy,' 'Poppy' and Aunt B (as Little Sister calls them) and anxiously looking forward to meeting their new baby sister. An hour later and all my Girls were together, congregated on the hospital bed. The Girl was eager to hold Baby Miss while Little Sister repeatedly exclaimed, "She's so cute!" but was a bit apprehensive and kept her distance. We asked her several times if she wanted to hold Baby Miss and each time her reply was the same, "No."

Just before 11:00, the on-call pediatrician came to our room and confirmed the arrythmia that the triage and labor and delivery nurses had heard from the fetal monitor. Within minutes Baby Miss was being whisked away to the NICU with J by her side. After a quick check of my vitals I was allowed to join them. Upon my arrival, Baby Miss had already been hooked up to a 3-lead EKG and preparations were under way for her to be hooked up to a 12-lead EKG for a more detailed reading of what her heart was doing. There was barely enough room on her little chest for them to attach the 15 pink, sticky tabs (leads) that would secure the wires in place and it was absolutely agonizing to watch Baby Miss's little arms flail and to hear her tiny voice wailing when the test was done and all those sticky tabs had to be pulled off. Then the 3-lead EKG was put back on as well as a sensor on the bottom of her foot to measure her oxygen saturation level. For the next 30 hours (up until she was discharged) these items and their four attached wires remained on her body. Thankfully, it did not prohibit us from being able to hold and snuggle her, it just limited us to a 5-foot travel radius. In addition to constant monitoring, Baby Miss was subjected to several blood draws for different tests and that blood was obtained from various locations - her heel, from an artery in her wrist and from a vein. J and I learned that the blood reveals different things when taken from different places. For example, blood that is taken from an artery is 'fresher' than blood taken from a vein or that the simple act of squeezing the heel to get more blood changes the property of the blood rather than if it were just allowed to drip at it's own pace. While all these tidbits were fascinating I'd rather not have known if it meant that my sweet little baby didn't have to be poked. The worst part of the entire experience for me was watching helplessly while one of the nurses struggled to find a miniscule vein in Baby Miss's arm. But, all the while I couldn't help but feel grateful because I knew that adjacent rooms held very sick babies, babies that had been in the NICU for weeks and were facing much greater obstacles than Baby Miss. And it was heartbreaking to see a volunteer rocking the baby next door whose parents were absent the entire time we were there. We were also grateful for the wonderful nurses who took such great care of Baby Miss (and us as worried parents) and the doctor (who was just a couple of years older than us) who took the time to explain in detail and even draw a diagram for us of what he thought was happening and also spent time getting to know us on a more personal level. It was very evident that his passion is caring for sick babies and their

families. Baby Miss's 12-lead EKG was sent to the cardiologist at Children's Hospital and he confirmed what our NICU doctor had

suspected, that the 'dropped beat' that was occuring at irregular intervals was not uncommon among newborns and that most likely

Baby Miss would quickly grow out of it and that even if she didn't, it would not be consequential to her health. And indeed, the frequency with which she was having these dropped beats had gone down in just the short time that we'd been in the NICU. So with that we were alerted of Baby Miss's impending discharge...she had just one more hurdle to overcome - the carseat test. Apparently passing the carseat test is a requirement for all NICU patients before they can be discharged. In order to pass the test, Baby Miss would have to sit in her carseat for 90 minutes and keep her heart rate and oxygen level above an accepted benchmark. If she failed the test twice she'd be required to stay another 24 hours in the NICU before taking the test again. Thirty minutes into the first test and Baby Miss's oxygen fell below the allowable level - fail! So we took her out of the seat, I nursed her and then it was back in the seat for round two. This time the nurse made J and I leave the room, I think she could tell that J was a Nervous Nelly and that he'd be better off pre-occupying his time with a video of infant CPR, also a requirement for discharge. Happily, Baby Miss passed the second attempt and shortly after 5:00

on Monday evening we were being escorted out of the building by our nurse. We were elated and anxious to get home to our other Girls (whom we

had not seen in over 24 hours) and to get Baby Miss home. Upon our arrival, we were enthusiastically greeted by the Girl and Little Sister. We barely got in the door before they demanded that we put the carseat down so that they could see Baby Miss. Then they proceeded to pat her head and give her kisses. We eventually had to pry them away from the carseat so that we could get Baby Miss out. Home sweet home!

Welcome Baby Miss!

Arrived: Sunday 11.14.2010 at 5:57am.

Weight: 6 pounds, 3 ounces

Length: 19 1/2 inches

Splash

The other night the Girls took tremendous pleasure from being splashed in the face by oncoming waves via a cup and my hand propelling the water out of the

cup. I did it once just for fun and that was all it took - they were hooked and kept clambering for more, or "moy" as Little Sister says it. Eyes squinched tightly shut in anticipation of the oncoming wave and then gasps of air after the big soak followed by dripping eyelashes and fits of gleeful giggles before preparation for the next round. This went on for quite some time, until the bath water went from toasty warm, to lukewarm and finally bordering on cold before I delivered the disappointing news that it was

time to get out. After some protest and the promise of getting to do it again next time I finally managed to get their pruny little bodies out

of the tub and snuggled into towels. In other news, we are all eagerly awaiting Baby Miss to join us. She is not due for another four days but we all agree that it is high time for her to come out and play!

2-Year Old Antics

In the past week Little Sister has been displaying what I'm sure are some pretty common antics characteristic among most 2-year olds.

Unraveling toilet paper in the bathroom.

Finding a new pack of gum in my purse and unwrapping every single piece in the two minutes it took me to brush my teeth.
Hiding in the pantry.


And yesterday she caused quite a stir when we dropped the Girl off at school. Could've been the sunglasses...or maybe it was the purse casually slung over her shoulder.